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A Compliment Every Mother Needs to Hear After Giving Birth
22nd Sep 2022
3 mins read
A birth brings a whole lot of attention to the new baby, unsurprisingly. We get it, and we’re guilty of that too. When visiting friends with a newborn, we often fuss over and compliment the baby. Then after spending sufficient time obsessing over their round tummies, tiny fingers and soft hair we then turn our attention to our friend to check in, ask how she’s doing, and sympathize over postpartum life. However, if our own birth experience has taught us anything, it’s that there’s ONE compliment every mother needs to hear after giving birth.
Of course, it’s not that any mother doesn’t like hearing about her adorable newborn. As a matter of fact, one could argue that every new mother is so infatuated with her brand-new baby, she’s more than happy to hear about their cuteness and perfection. Still, those compliments, however wonderful, aren’t what a new mom NEEDS to hear. Instead, those who have just given birth needs to be told how strong, incredible and brave she is for bringing a baby into the world.
It is not of relevance how she did it, either. It doesn’t make a difference if her birth was a c-section or vaginal, medicated or unmedicated, at hospital or at home, in the back of a car or on a picnic blanket in the middle of a forest surrounded by trees and other creatures. It doesn’t matter how this oh-so necessary compliment is said. You can even involve the words “warrior”, “awesome” or “goddess”, or something more along the lines of, “you’re absolutely amazing, you did it!” or, “I’m so damn proud of you!”, or “damn girl, I can’t believe you made a human,” would work, too!
All a new mama needs to know is that her nearest and dearest recognize that she just went through a major, life-changing experience that, for some of us easily tops the hardest things we’ve ever done in our lives! Seriously though, if you’re close enough to another woman that you’re visiting her and her brand-new baby, you’re probably close enough to sincerely care about her feelings and physical and mental wellbeing. Making it a priority to ensure she feels heard, seen and cared for, in important light of what she has just been through – and to show that you absolutely recognize the undeniable strength that’s necessary to birth a child; a strength she clearly has – will most likely give her a much-needed boost of self-confidence and self-assurance. New mamas are not exempt from feeling the positives a genuine compliment can provide.
Whilst we think complimenting a new mother should be the priority and should come before acknowledgement and cooing over the baby, we totally get how amazing it is to see a new baby, too. Of course, it’s not realistic to see a newborn and not give her or him your immediate attention, especially since, as a culture, we’ve been mentally conditioned to somewhat ignore mamas the moment their babies are born (unless of course it’s Mother’s Day, apparently). It’s rare to find a new mother who didn’t feel a tad empty and alone directly after having her baby (hello hormones!). Which is why complimenting a new mother, and only that new mother, needs to happen. Mothers are still complete people! It feels good to know that we’re seen as such. We feel entire spectrums of emotions when it comes to delivering and meeting our baby for the first time, not forgetting the aftermath of what the most overwhelming, physical and significantly painful things can arguably be we ever do, too. It is so lovely to know that our loved ones – people we turn to for support when feeling these big kinds of feelings recognize that, too.
